FOLLOW ME

“People who really want to make a difference in the world usually do it, in one way or another. And I’ve noticed something about people who make a difference in the world: They hold the unshakable conviction that individuals are extremely important, that every life matters. They get excited over one smile. They are willing to feed one stomach, educate one mind, and treat one wound. They aren’t determined to revolutionize the world all at once; they’re satisfied with small changes. Over time, though, the small changes add up. Sometimes they even transform cities and nations, and yes, the world.” –Beth Clark

A few months ago, I was given a book called Follow Me by David Platt. This book takes a deeper (but simple) view about when Jesus said “Follow Me”. On the back cover of this book (the last “paragraph”) it says “Two simply words that change everything. You will never be bored. You will always have purpose. You will never lack joy. But it will cost you. This call is not an invitation to pray a prayer. It is a summons to lose your life.” (can you say….POWERFULLY JAW DROPPING TRUTH?!) 

I am SO excited for the 11 people from Valley that are coming to Masii in July (Mom, Dad, Caleb, Sarah, Catie, Rick, Kaleb, Ken, Sean, Jackie, and Ian). Everyone here is SO excited too. I cannot wait for these 11 people, including 6 people whom this will be their first time to Masii, to experience my home and all the joy the people here have to offer. Something that most people don’t really tell you about (except Grandma Kathy, thanks for the heads up) is the unsure reaction of those when you get home. This is “warning” for the team before they even come! 

This is not a criticism to those who have said this but recently when rereading Follow Me, I realized something, we are ALL called to MAKE DISCIPLES, TO GO OUT INTO THE WORLD, TO DIE AND TO LIVE IN CHRIST, TO LIVE IN A WAY THE HONORS CHRIST (even if we screw up every day, we have to work every day towards becoming the person that Jesus has called us to be, but we don’t get to that place of perfection until we get to heaven). We cannot live our lives in a way that simply is a result of our saying the “sinners prayer” (which Platt brings up, is never once in the bible *gasp*). We have to live in a way that truly honors who God is and the sacrifice and grace that Jesus has given to us. 

There is NO reason, to feel weird or awkward about asking someone who has been in the “mission field” for a time about the nitty gritty stuff that happened. No matter where you go or how long or who you go with, you will eventually see something that rocks a foundation you thought you had. Jesus never sends us on “mission trips” to simply remind us that we have more; He does this so that we can GIVE of what we have and what we know about the saving grace of Jesus. As much as Masii is (one of two) of my safe places in the world, it’s not safe because I know that will never get hurt (hello?! Malaria!), or I know what every day will look like or because I fit in (I definitely don’t, mzungu), it’s safe because THIS is the first place that I ever truly saw the joy, the heart, the strength, and the laughter of Jesus. These people are Jesus to me, they exemplify His joy and love every single day. The easiest way for me to see how Jesus works, is how my Grandma Kathy’s heart for Japan is similar to mine for Masii (DIFFERENT because she has years and year on me). I have spent hours with her talking about how the “coming home” reaction is always awkward for me, she has shared with me about how to have grace with those who have never seen or experienced what I have.

I love people. I love to watch people interact with each other. I love that Jesus created people in such a way that EACH person is completely different. I love that going on mission’s trips brings out people’s hearts. Each trip we have taken as a team, everyone has a one specific defining moment, a moment that they will never forget. For example, I love when my mom talks about her “defining” moment being a WEEP center in Kithari slum and how their singing and joy helps her in her daily life even now, and how mine will always be the first time I ever heard a group of Kenyan children sing at the top of their lungs to a Jesus who has saved them from a life of hopelessness. I love that each person is different. Yes, I may love the same TV show as my best friend, I may love the same music as my sister, I may love to read books like my friend, but we are all truly different. Something I have had to learn, is that there is only a certain “level” of info that people can handle, when talking about a 3^rd world country and learning that that’s ok! I will never be able to fully put into words, how I feel when getting of that plane in Nairobi, how I feel when children lovingly scream “teacher Mwende” at me, how I feel when I sit alone in my room at night completely drained of the day’s events then as I prepare my heart to be drained once again (thank you Jesus for the cycle), how I feel when I am completely exhausted and dirty and I go to turn on the shower and it doesn’t work, how I feel by the fact that last year I have two doors for my room (wooden one and a bar gate kind of door with a pad lock) and how now I have a small singular door with a very small lock, how I feel about showering and sleeping with bugs, how I feel about how poorly I actually am at hand washing my own clothes (practice makes perfect?!), or how I truly feel about getting on a plane and about a day and a half later ending up 9,000 miles away from where I started. 

I love this blog and I have found SO much freedom in telling about my journey through Masii.

Yet, most don’t know (but could probably guess), that I don’t proof read my posts before I post them. Why? Because I learned quickly that if I reread it before clicking “publish”, I would change or try to fix something I said to make it sound more like how it may sound better. But I have learned that it doesn’t have to “sound better”, this is real and no its not the nitty gritty, I have fallen in love with a city of people who make me want to write love songs to Jesus every day (blogs instead!) and I have learned that love is better than fear. 

(Yup, who would have thought I was scared! “not I said the fly”)

I may never find the truest words to express how all this poverty and hurt here makes me feel, so instead I choose to see God’s goodness in the midst of hurt. I went to college with some people who also came to Africa for a few months each summer and served and loved on the people here (not in Masii but other places). For a while, I felt like I had people who got it (except they didn’t really want to talk about it, weird) soon though, they broke down and the poverty and hurt was all they could see and they became bitter. That seems crazy to me, hard for me to believe. That is why I won’t (or ill try my best) not to complain about the things here that are different or uncomfortable to me, I can’t live in this place where I make my problems of waterless showers, hand washing my clothes, or bugs in my bed bigger than the problem of poverty and pain that is right outside my door. Yet, after spending hours in prayer, praying to God that I never want that to be me, this place He has called me to is WAY bigger than little me and I never want it to be about what I can do. And THAT is why there is no reason to complain about the things I cannot comprehend, Jesus didn’t send me here to comprehend the poverty, sickness, or pain here. But rather He sent me here because I said YES, I said YES to seeing these people in Heaven, I said YES to comforting (and playing) with these children who see me as “better” (SO NOT!), I said YES every morning here when I step outside unsure of what today will hold. This is not to toot my own horn but rather to share, that this is what we are all called to. We can’t give excuses our whole life because excuses don’t get us into heaven. 

“Two simply words that change everything. You will never be bored. You will always have purpose. You will never lack joy. But it will cost you. This call is not an invitation to pray a prayer. It is a summons to lose your life.” Jesus has already called you, now you just have to listen; I promise that every single second is worth it. YOU HAVE PURPOSE, YOU HAVE A DESTINY, YOU HAVE AN INVITATION TO GIVE UP “COMFORTABLE” AND STEP INTO TRUE JOY IN JESUS.

I am not extraordinary, I am not special, I am not brave, I simply listened to what Jesus asked of me and I never looked back or argued why me. 

 “People from my first home say I'm brave. They tell me I'm strong. They pat me on the back and say, 'Way to go. Good job.' But the truth is, I am not really very brave; I am not really very strong; and I am not doing anything spectacular. I am simply doing what God has called me to do as a person who follows Him. He said to feed His sheep and He said to care for 'the least of these,' so that's what I'm doing, with the help of a lot people who make it possible and in the company of those who make my life worth living”-Katie Davis

For the team that is coming in July, a few things.  First, everyone is already SO excited that you are coming! Second, thank you for saying yes to Jesus and His calling for you to come! Thirdly, thank you for bringing more Mzungus (white man) to Masii J Mom, Dad, Caleb, Sarah, Catie, Rick, Kaleb, Ken, Sean, Jackie, and Ian YOU ARE LOVED, YOU ARE COURAGEOUS, YOU ARE OBEDIENT OF YOUR CALLING, AND JESUS IS SO PROUD. And I am praying for you as you continue to prepare for your trip.