Saturday, February 2, 2013

Fear of darkness, doubt in Jesus.

Tonight I was sitting next to a little boy on a ride at Disneyland, at one point the ride got very dark and I looked and him in worry that he may begin to cry. Why was I worried? Why did I assume he would be scared? As children I think as some point we were all afraid of the dark. I know that some of the kids in my life are certainly afraid of the dark, but I have never asked why. Did they watch a scary movie? Do they have nightmares? If so, what could the nightmares be about? We all have biggest fears or the thing we are most afraid of, for me it's sharks. I am utterly terrified, that sometimes I can't even swim in the deep end of a swimming pool (& yes I am 22). I know for me, I simply watched Jaws too early in life. I let my imagination get the best of me when I was around any large amounts of water. As I sit and think about the kids in my life and the fears they have shared with me, there is usually a simple understandable reason behind their fear. My heart skips a beat, when I'm babysitting and I put the child down to sleep and they cry out that they need a nightlight or something. I don't mind that they need it but I am heart broken that their fear is something that makes them feel like they are being swallowed up by darkness. Usually if the child I am babysitting, needs/wants a nightlight, after giving it to them I sit outside their room and pray that their dreams are consumed with life and with Jesus. I think that sometimes as adults we allow our fears to be simply something we have always been afraid of or something we once saw in a very cheesey horror film. Like fear of darkness, doubt in Jesus is created out of a somewhat "cheesey horror film", we create situations in which we "try" God and we don't give him our everything so we doubt him because he "failed". Doubt is the enemy's way of whispering lies into our ears. We need to sit outside the room of our doubts and pray that there may be life and hope. Through Jesus there is hope and there is hope in the darkness. "Perfect love casts out fear.." Jesus is perfect love.

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